Russian Troll Farmer Expects Bumper Crop

Artist rendition of Russian Troll Farm.

St. Petersburg, RS – According to Dimitry Smirnov, a Russia troll farmer, 2020 promises to be a fantastic year for troll farms across the Russian Federation. 

“Well, it is American election year. We have lots of, um, exports for USA,” he said before breaking into fits of laughter. 

The trolls had a magnificent iridescent, oily gleam under the bright St. Petersburg sun, which Smirnov attributed to nicotine and vodka. “They look like that as they ripen,” he boasted. “As soon as they bloat, these trolls are just about ready for export.”

The United States and Europe import hundreds of thousands of troll-related products from Russia, including tweets, Facebook posts, and hateful memes.


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